Monday, August 01, 2005

work in progress

so today i was supposed to get up very early (we're talking 5am here) in order to make ellensburg by 8am for a student orientation/meet-with-adviser/find-apartment kind of day. what ended up happening in reality was i passed out on my friend's couch (after a little too much beer) and didn't wake up to my alarm on my phone (i don't think i ever have, but judgment was never my strong suit), which leaves me now at about 10am a good couple of hours away. and so begins another day of getting absolutely nothing important accomplished. with the noted exception, of course, of this list of excuses for my dad to explain why i didn't go:
1) got held up by a gang of pidgins (this could happen at any seattle park with the right amount of stale bread).
2) met angelina jolie (circa hackers), and she fell head over heels for me. we're getting married next month.
3) there was a freak accident outside of bill cosby's house, and my car is now filled with jello.
4) i had to spy on the russians.
5) tom cruise called to say that if i missed my scientology meeting, xenu would not be pleased.
6) couldn't get out of my tea time with the queen.
7) a giant praying mantis threatened to eat my head if i went.
8) i got on the wrong bus and ended up in panama with no liver.
9) i meant to call, but work ran kind of late. hey, i brought you take-out (okay, this might belong in a different list).
and of course, the one you've been waiting for...
10) i drank too much and passed out (sometimes, the truth can sound pretty ridiculous too).